Matchingsocks’s Weblog

There has been a lot to digest these past few weeks since there has been a lot happening. There’s the cyclone in Burma which is awfully distressing to hear about. And then there’s the latest earthquake in China. And while China seems to have gotten- or at least, are getting- their act together, the same can’t be said for Burma.

When the thing hit, this girl spent much of her time, valiantly, trying to get through to her friends over there. She got a dial tone and had to settle for calling their family and friends based locally. She finally did manage to speak to her closer friends after a few days when telecommunication lines were restored a little to hear stories of fear, close shaves and the disaster up close and personal. It took every ounce of her self control to not want to break down at the breakfast table; she was having breakfast with The Boy’s family and didn’t think it was ultimately polite to collapse into an emotional heap.

Thankfully, the children at the orphanage she volunteers at are all safe. The home lost their roof, but, that’s all under control. All her close friends are all accounted for and though many are very upset and lost, are all ok and that’s really all she can ask for. Its still hard to get through to her friends and that in itself is rather upsetting. The PhD has gone back to aid the situation and this girl (and Smartest Friend) are worried for his safety; and more importantly, his emotional (many of his friends were affected) and physical (he had just come out of a kidney stone surgery) state.

So, once again, twice in under a year, this girl holds her breath for The Other Land.

Please pray with her.

This girl and the boy are back from their Hong Kong shopping spree. They ate a lot, laughed a lot, probably put on far too much weight, wrecked havoc on their credit cards and had a great time. Macau was fun too, not that this girl really gambled. She did play a few rounds of Casino Wars (basically, dealer and player gets one card each and the person with the bigger card won. Its not the cleverest of games, she knows.) and won a little much to her amusement. The Boy was far more adventurous and won far more than this girl.

There is little, really, to write about their time in Hong Kong and people that ask them how it went, basically got the usual spiel of good food and their fervent raves about the great Wagyu beef they had at the Venetian (a totally over the top casino that recreates the streets of Venice, complete with a fully functioning lagoon, a replica of the bridge of sighs and gondolas with singing boatmen) as well as their great shopping buys and the fact that this girl walked out of Kate Spade with- are you ready for it- SIX new bags. Two were for The Mother (birthday and mother’s day), one was for The Princess, one was a gift from The Boy and two were to tide her over her great distress over her room.

You see, three days before this girl was due back her toilet pipe had burst unceremoniously flooding her room. Her room is split level with the toilet located on the lower floor on the inner side of the room. Meaning, she essentially had a little wading pool, since it was a while before The Princess managed to figure out what was happening and go to the rescue. She rescued Jake (the Big Baby Taylor) mainly, since the TV was (thankfully) out of the spray and the bed (that sits on the floor) was far too gone. So you can see why she needed a new bag (ok, two) to make her feel better.

In any case, this girl’s house is under majorish renovations so she’s been displaced. Its a dusty, noisy situation that is rather distressing for her to deal with on a day to day basis. How The Maid and the Dogs deal with the incessant cement dust, scrapings, drillings, and in flux of people all day is beyond her. And now, she’s got to deal with how to re-do her room.

Its been a mad rush of a last week with too many projects all coming to a head for this girl. There was the consult paper she had to write for the MNC and the training stint she had to do for the other tertiary education institution. And, oh, there was her setting up of another company (The Inc.)- though this time, this one should only be for her freelance work purposes. So along with that came the bank matters, the government filing matters and all the other operational, logistical shindigs. Then, came the installation of her latest part-time staff (Miss Pedantic) who was unceremoniously handed her huge to-do project list. And, needless to say, the other million projects she’s gettng her feet- though some would argue, her entire being- wet.

Its been a busy week, reminising of the time she was starting The Company; only this time round, its purely on her terms and she’s not running it to the same extent or degree. Then again, as she tells The Boy, she’s finding it hard- almost against instinct- to not want to grow the business. But for now, she’s busy growing other people’s businesses so, its entertaining her mind and feeding that business part of her.

And so, amidst the many new things that this girl finds her self preoccupied with, the boy decides to whisk this girl off to Macau and Hong Kong for a week of fun and frivolities. (The boy needs the break from his own huge and overflowing plate.) And much as this girl would love to say, “she needs this break” because she is “oh so busy;” it seems almost wrong given she’s spent the better part of the last year traveling to all sorts of places.

But, yes, be jealous, this girl is on a break. Again.

Heh.

Over the years, Smelly Melly and this girl seem to have developed a code to signal each other on their need for a listening ear. Most times when either calls the other, they start with a nursery rhyme and the other person, in grand spy fashion, will reply with the second line of a separate rhyme. For example, Smelly Melly will call and say, “Baa baa black sheep” and this girl might reply with, “How I wonder what you are?” Its an ongoing game that they play that amuses them endlessly since, despite their pact to not use those two rhymes, (Baa Baa Black Sheep and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star), and use other rhymes (they have tried “Humpty Dumpty sat on the Wall” - ” Eating her curds and whey” to great hilarity), but that doesn’t quite happen so often.

Anyway, while most of their calls to each other are about the mundane day to day matters of love and life, they also do have their moments of “distress calls”. And they usually start like this, “Hey babe, do you have five minutes?” The voice is usually slightly sombre, on occasion tinged with a muted sigh or sob. The tone is soft and oddly heavy. There is an echo that reverberates through that speaks of a honest, open vulnerability, laid bare for the other to see. This is their way of calling for help, asking the other person to be the other’s container, the voice of reason and hope and, at the heart of it all, a manner of a life line to the soul.

Vulnerability leaves many of us deeply uncomfortable. We often mistake emotional openness- people who wear their heart on their sleeves- with a person comfortable with vulnerability. And while that is fair to say i some respect, vulnerability- this girl believes- comes from a place deep within. It is a stripped-bare moment and with the understanding that there is a high possibility of judgment coupled with the willingness to lay one’s heart, spirit and sometimes soul at another’s feet and believing, no, hoping- sometimes with more than just the slightest holding of breath- that the other person will gently, and loving mend it.

It takes a lot of courage for a person to be truly vulnerable. It takes a great deal more for a strong person, unused to leaning on anything for a crutch, or, for that matter, asking for help at all to fully let themselves be laid bare. It has got nothing to do with how much you love a person, for have we not seen couples deeply in love not honestly share their fears, secrets, and, wait for it, inner vulnerabilities. Some of us are so used to having to hold it all together, used to always having all the answers, used to keeping everything in our lives in check, dotting our i’s and crossing our t’s, successfully lining all our ducks in a row. We are so used to doing and having it all that when it comes to being vulnerable, we fail.

To be honest, this girl is rarely vulnerable. She’s worked through most of her issues- yes, most, not all; she still has some issues to deal with- and her open book life means that she carries with her very little baggage. But in the quiet moments when life still becomes a tad more than she cares to carry on her tiny shoulders; in the dead of the night when small, insidious whispers can hasten into a hailing scream; in the ensuing dramatic hailstorm that is her life; this girl allows herself to be vulnerable with the select one or two people close to her. Most times, this girl doesn’t even say very much. Neither does she need loads of advice or life directions. Most times, this girl knows the score and knows what she needs to do.

All she truly needs, is for someone to be that safe space to allow her to simply be vulnerable. And for those that have given her that- you know who you are- she is infinitely blessed.

If you have been following this girl’s grad school journey, you’d know that she’s been having second thoughts about it. Last week, she sent an email out to the people that she loves telling them of her decisions. She’s reproducing it here:

Dear People that This girl loves,

Hello everyone.
Its taken This girl a long time to write this email, but she finally able to do it. So, here goes… Some of you would already know that she has been rethinking her decision to go off to graduate school.

The reasons are simple:
One, This girl has realized that she’s really rather unable to work for someone else, or under someone else. This includes the UN. If you’d think back, the big impetus for going to grad school was because working with the UN meant needing a masters. It was a means to an end. And it follows, thus, that if she was not going to work for the UN after all, why is she even going off to grad school?

Two, This girl has realized that she does love this semi-relaxed life she’s leading. She gets to do freelance work of her choosing, NGO/NPO work when the opportunity arises and other interesting projects that seem to keep her plate rather full in the past few months. She’s truly having the time of her life. She knows that even if she heads off to grad school these many cool things would still be around when she gets back; but grad school no longer holds the same appeal in light of the career and life opportunities from this new vantage point.

Three, This girl has realized that if she went to grad school it was because she can. Think Sir Edmund Hilary climbing Everest because its there. It, in itself, is a fine- and some would argue, reasonable- argument to go off to grad school. But its simply not enough.

So, yes, This girl is not going to go to graduate school. By the time you read this, she’d have replied all the schools to inform them of her decision and she’s very at peace with her decision; even with the knowledge that she might never get to go to Fletcher or any other school in the future. Its another chapter she’s closing- although, she’s gotta add, that this chapter was one of much excitement and alot of “I told you so!s”

To be fair, this whole endeavor has been a real blessing in disguise. Without this grad school shindig, This girl would never have been able to get the kind of rest she needed given the very eventful 2007 she’s had. She had time to heal, to grow, to take stock, to focus on herself and she finds herself at the end of it all a complete person. Whole in a way she has never really been before. A good fthis girlnd of hers told her that life had to be led with a “seriousness of purpose” and she thinks that she’s finally understanding what that means.

This girl would like to take this chance to thank you all for all the love, encouragement and support you have all shown her in the months (and in some of your cases, years) past. Many of you have been an absolute rock in this drama-mama life that she leads. Most notably, her family whom she loves and adores greatly. To good fthis girlnds who kept her sane, kept her on point and kept her best interest at heart at all time- thank you. To the three people that she bullied into writing her recommendation letters (you know who you are), she’s really grateful you had such great faith in her, her abilities and her potential. You each have a big dinner treat waiting for you. To Smartest Friend, sorry you’d have to make this journey on your own, but know that This girl is rooting for you with her heart, mind and soul. To everyone else, big hugs and big love all round.

This girl loves you all loads.
Hugs, love and God’s richest blessings,

This girl.

When this girl was working for The First Company (the first organization she worked for) she met The Monk- who, of course, wasn’t a monk then, but was, quite simply, another close friend. He was a great guy, a funny guy with a sense of humour and the biggest heart you could imagine in a bear of a man. Smart, earnest, generous; he was the epitome of everyone’s favourite uncle, everyone’s best buddy. He was the rock many leaned on, the one who would never judge you for the stupid things that you’d do and the one who would stay back, without anyone asking, to clean up, long after.

Yes, he was that guy.

A few years ago, this said friend gave up his high powered job in a high powered firm for the saffron robe. He entered a Thai monastery for what would be a short stint as a monk, only to find that new life so fulfilling, three years on, he has no plans to return to the world of corporate back biting and the ugly rat race. Though, seriously, who can blame him?

A few days ago, The Monk dropped by- a rare appearance from his forest monastery and this girl and The Boy went by for a visit with Kungfu Master, Aunty B and Monkey God. The monastery was a surreal space of zen quietness echoing with the humming of an ancient- albeit a little foreign- peace. Hushed voices, slightly bowed heads and the odd snatches of incense that at the same time pinched the senses and clouded the mind. And so, half sitting, half kneeling- because this girl didn’t quite know how to sit without her feet pointing to The Monk (it’s considered rude and inappropriate)- she sat in respectful reverence for her old friend.

He was half the size the last time this girl met him, and twice the person. He had the same smile, the same vocal inflections and the same sparkle in his eyes. He spoke with the same ease, as though it was only yesterday they had last met; and shared with the wisdom of a man who seemed to have lived three lifetimes over.

“When you reach a stage in life, ” he said, “You come to the realization that there are only three real states of being: Coming. Going. Staying.”

“Then, ” he continues, “You reach the next stage in life and you realize there are really only two real states of being: Coming. Going.”

“Finally, ” he enthused with the innocence of a sage and the wisdom of the child, “You reach the final stage in life and you realize, actually, there’s only one state of being: Coming and going. “

This girl didn’t quite understand, but it was a cool ass piece of advice.

Some of you would already know this, so it won’t come as such a shock to you guys. But for the uninformed, this might come as a tad of a shocker to you, but here goes:

This girl is reconsidering her decision to go to grad school.

(Read: This girl might not go after all.)

To be honest, its been something that she’s thought about for a long time already. Questioning her decision to go as been happening not just in her tiny brain, but she has been asked by several close friends if it is really necessary for her to go. One such person is Staircase Master who questioned the real necessity for grad school outside of her to have her masters just to fulfill some UN work pay scale criteria since she already more than qualified for the job in question when one looks at job scope alone. He made mention that she might be better off taking the next two years and simply working to get more policy ground experience if she’s able to consider not working for the UN.

As it turns out, he’s not far from the truth. This girl has come to the realization that she cannot really work for anyone else other than herself. Sure, she does bit projects for The Father and stuff, but she mainly keeps her easy-going flexi-time lifestyle which she loves dearly. Sure, she has loads of projects from personal referrals- most clients don’t know she’s not with The Company anymore- but she still gets to keep her mild-travelust, moderate-corporate woman lifestyle which she is finding it hard to pass up.

And so, if this girl is not going to work for the UN- which would most likely see her working under some two bit dumbass that she’d hate and disrespect greatly- it begs the question of why she’s even headed off to grad school in the first place. Becoming a corporate animal at the UN? She might positively not survive the experience. Some friends have wagered she won’t last past half a year. Green Bra gives her two months. The mother gives her two weeks. The odds don’t seem to be in this girl’s favour.

In addition, her plate recently has been finding itself rather full from bit projects that have stacked up back to back. She’s finding herself oddly busier and busier. This is in spite of her putting off more and more projects. How that all adds up, she’s not sure; but she’s duly time entertained. And, of course, she has more stuff up her sleeves in terms of the things and new things she’d like to do: Like bringing in a new program to town for the fun of it.

So, should she still go?

This girl fully expected to be able to sleep in on a Saturday when The Boy woke her- unceremoniously at half past seven in the morning- to begin a “Quest for the Magical Eggplant.” He had designed- with her sisters and best friends- an amazing race type quest for her while she was away. She had fully intended to go shopping with Smelly Melly later that day, but it seems that even that was ruse to simply get her to block out the day! So, he presented her with a empty charm bracelet and told her she was to “go forth” and find seven charms which were stolen and spread across the land by an evil Wizard; for it was only when the charms were reunited would the wearer (this girl) be able to find the Magical Eggplant (The Boy). And so, still with sleep in her eyes, this girl was hurried out of bed and on to her magical quest.

The first clue led her to visit the Princess and the Pea (The Princess, who was still asleep- it was really early in the morning when this girl set off on this quest) who required her to give her a back rub before she would hand over the first charm: a doggy charm with a red leash.

The second clue led her to find the Sage (The Prefect- who was sleeping next to The Princess so it was geographically easy for this girl) who would present her with her next charm. After a hilarious fifteen minutes of bantering and The Prefect trying to sound valiantly theatrical and this girl having to make the little one breakfast, she walked away with her second charm: an old vinyl record player.

The third clue sent her to the airport in search for the bears: Smelly Melly (British Bear) and Onion (Bored Brute Bear). This girl got there ahead of schedule and bumped into Smelly Melly before she could “go into hiding”. Thankfully, she didn’t give this girl a hard time and handed over the third charm: a little luggage, complete with the cutest white tee inside.

The fourth clue suggested that Onion was at the Happy Place (MacDonald’s) and she oddly took a while to find him. Onion is not naturally into these games and it attests- as she was reminded time and time again- to how much he cares for this girl as a friend to be helping The Boy. He told this girl he was bored and she was actually made to buy him a magazine before he was willing to hand this charm over. She bought him a photography magazine stuffed unceremoniously behind the National Enquirer. He handed over the fourth charm: a pair of running shoes.

The fifth clue told her to venture forth to the tombstone in the orchard (it was a shopping center) to find the place where she should seek the Elfling at the place one would see Nigella and Jamie. With Smelly Melly by her side, this girl found her way to the cooking section (this girl and the boy cook alot together) which was wrong. It was the bookshop instead and there she found Zwieback who made her buy a cookbook before turning in the fifth charm: A set of cutlery.

There wasn’t a sixth clue but this girl was led to the artist section to discover a hidden charm box with her sixth charm nestled within: a dragonfly.

The following clue sent her across the island to the coffee and tea fields of Guthrie House where she was supposed to find the Wizard and Sorceress who were guardians of the last and most precious of charms. This girl racked her brains all the way there trying to figure out who this final pair was in vain, and true to fashion, there was no one she recognize! Smelly Melly got her to announce- rather loudly, might she add- to the sitting, bemused public that she was on a treasure quest and looking for the wizard and sorceress. Everyone there was duly amused as she went table by table asking. As luck would have it, she found them outside, sitting right in a corner.

The sorceress presented this girl with a necklace laden with many charms and this girl was tasked to pick which of them was the final charm. The necklace had about 10 charms on them, each with its own possibilities; this girl only had three guesses. She picked a horse shoe (because she and The Boy kinda got together at a horse stable)- which she was told was wrong. Next, she picked a car (because they both love cars)- which was also wrong. Finally, she picked a hot air balloon (because she always says that The Boy lives on cloud nine). The Wizard thought it was a sassy and funny enough answer and told her that the truth of the matter was that the final charm wasn’t on the necklace itself. It would later be revealed that her choices did mirror that of The Boy’s: he had tried to buy her a horse shoe but it was out of stock. So was the car.

The final clue bid her to know that “the bracelet was complete, the journey was nearly done, follow the cherub’s gaze to the place where two became one.” This was the same said restaurant where this girl and The Boy ate at the day they got together- a full circle. Only this time in the company of close friends (the Wizard and Sorceress were The Boy’s best friend and girlfriend whom she was meeting for the first time).

When this girl got to the restaurant, she was regaled with The Boy reciting his final lines as the Magical Eggplant and she was presented with the most gorgeous Kate Spade bag (the same said one she almost bought a few weeks earlier) and tickets to the Contender Asia Finals (the same said performance she almost bought tickets too a few days earlier).

It was a lovely, lovely gesture on The Boy’s part. He had apparently been planning this for weeks and had conspired with everyone else to make this “quest” happen for this girl. There were long discussions, a flurry of emails and loads of subterfuge to keep it from this girl.

And about the charms? Each charm corresponded with a milestone in the journey this girl and The Boy had made to get them together; so they were not only pretty, but meaningful. And while this girl is not exactly a charm wearing kind of person, they decided they’d add a charm to commemorate each milestone from now.

How lucky can one girl get? * beams *

This is to officially inform all of you that this girl has started a new category on this blog- and chapter in her life- called “The Boy.”

Those of you that know who The Boy is, good for you. Surely you’ve had your fun with your I-told-you-sos and your silly smirks. Smelly Melly even earned herself a tres nice dinner over this development. Having said that, this girl (and The Boy) are happy; and happy that you all are happy for them. Big hugs.

Those of you that don’t know who The Boy is, em, too bad? (Sorry!) Well, if you know this girl personally, you’d figure it out sooner or later and if you read her blog close enough, you’d figure it out anyway. If you don’t know who this girl is, then, well, its no water off your back since you don’t know who this girl is anyway.

There is a part of her that thinks she should sit and type their whole hilarious story from start to finish- it’d read, seriously, like a straight to video Hollywood love story; but she won’t. It really is a hilariously ridiculous story that no one in their right mind would believe. Besides, it will take too long and, honestly, this girl will never do it justice.

This girl is in a tres good place.

The Fletcher scholarship has been in for about two days now and only today has the reality of it all sank in for this girl. She is going to graduate school. To Fletcher. In August. For two years. She’d be reading her masters in International Law and Diplomacy with 140 other people from all over the world. In one of the best schools America can offer. And, she’d be on scholarship.

Its a big deal, this scholarship and over a long, long coffee chat with Eggplant Project today she told him why the scholarship was such a big deal. The fact is, when this girl first applied to grad school, she knew that she might have to pay her way through school and she was more than able and willing to do so. Then, as time passed and the reality to the magnitude of the financial cost of grad school started to sink in and then, she really, really, wanted a scholarship to take care of the finance burden that will be grad school. Because, the idea that she’d have close to all of ther savings wiped out when she graduates scares her to bits. Absolutely. Completely.

Now, Mr. Toesocks reasoned with this girl that the fees- which she can make by way of a loan- is easily recovered. And given the statistics on salaries of Fletcher graduates, this girl knows that to be true. But, its the idea that terrifies her endlessly: that she’d be at financial ground zero upon graduation.

Maybe she’s being silly thinking of things, namely money and grad school, in this manner. But she does and in her head, it makes perfect sense. Besides, the idea that they thought highly enough of this girl to give her a scholarship tickles her to no end. And makes her feel darn good about herself.

And she’d take whatever compliments she can get.

The day this girl left for Uganda, The family retriever decided to skip town too. The house is under mild renovations and so when her leash got untied, the family retriever decided it might be a good idea to go a-visiting places. She stayed missing the entire time this girl was a away; in the loving care- thankfully- of a family that took her in till she could be returned home. The family retriever, in timely fashion, came back just hours before this girl did and her shaggy ass tail was there at the gate when this girl pulled up.

The sisters have been running amok this past week; frantic out of their mind. Putting up posters. Calling places. Making pleas to the general public. The Family German Shepherd, who is madly in love with the family retriever, was besides himself: he was visibly sad, refusing to eat or drink much and generally mopping round the house flat out miserable. Even after she returned, he refused to leave her side, content to simply lie next to her quietly; though every once in a while he’d fall asleep and wake with a start just to check that she was still there.

Grad school feels a lot like this to this girl. Kinda like she was lost for a long time and it gave her a renewed sense of purpose. A seriousness of purpose. And every now and then, she’d wake with a start, cos she wonders- and has serious doubts- that she’d make it in. Then came the news that she did make it in- to the school she’s been wanting to go to since she graduated from college. And today, she learns, they are offering her a generous scholarship. Wow.

And so, this girl sat quietly in her room staring at the package- almost blankly- in part due to a severe case of jet lag, in part due to a serious, but necessary conversation she had just had (which went tres well), and in part due to the realization that grad school has become a reality. And while the prudent thing is to wait out for Harvard, this girl knows, deep in her heart of hearts, she’s already made up her mind. That in fact, she’d made up her mind of where to go the day she met with them months ago.

Sometimes the answer really is that simple.

This girl is back from East Africa! She’s posted all the blog posts she wrote while she’s there so you all can go take a read. They are a tad wordy, but the week she spent there was truly rich in such flavour, she felt- and feels- that she’s wiser and better for it.

This girl returned home to wide open arms, bigger grins and a white lilies, all wrapped in a pretty purple thing. What could be better? Its good to be home.

Over the course of her being there, she received more grad school news. Some good, some not so good, but all still okay at the end. This girl got into John Hopkins (SAIS) but not into Princeton. Truth be told, she’s neither surprised nor upset by the news. She’d always known that Princeton was a long shot- and it faced stiff, stiff competition from Fletcher; where her heart is oddly still set on. And in light of the schools she’s gotten into, she’d not have gone to SAIS either.

Basically, she’s still standing where she was. Waiting for Fletcher to send her their scholarship pack and waiting for Harvard’s reply- she’s, however, not holding her breath.

Its a funny feeling, really, this girl thinks, having to deal with so many new things all at once. Grad school adding a huge load on top of the many things she has going on in her life. And for the first time in a long time, this girl sat back to really take things in. It was a huge moment, an honest moment- a grown up moment.

And to you that shared it with her, thank you. She lucked out.

(This post was written in Uganda. This girl is backdating it.)

After an incredibly touristy day that began with American pancakes for breakfast, shopping at the local crafts market and riding botas through the city, Mr. Toesocks took this girl to the fanciest restaurant in Kampala, a Belgian-French place that overlooks the shanty landscape (which is oddly beautiful and captivating) and has the best food she’s had in a while.

Over her scallop appetizers- which she has to acknowledge were really hard to come by given the landlocked nature of Uganda, - he set out asking her, seriously, how she’s been. He’d been duly worried about this girl since her big crash middle of last year, offering to fly out to hunt and maime the Fisherman for her. Mr. Toesocks has been practicing martial arts (think Muay Thai and Jujitsu) for over 20 years, so she takes his threats very seriously, especially after he moved to Africa.

She told him she was doing really well, happy- which he concurred, having now had the chance to catch up with this girl face to face and hearing and talking to her. He told her that he cares for very few people in his life and this girl happens to be one of them and that she should always remember that. And if she needed, he’d be on the next flight out to “settle” stuff for her if she just hollered.

Mr. Toesocks gave her standard “Come to Harvard” speech again and settled for this girl waiting till end of the month to make her decision. He offered to help her settle into Boston (since her choices are down to Fletcher and the still elusive Harvard). In fact, he’s offered to drive her from New York to Boston after they do the necessary shopping for furniture and other home-things. And oh, he also said he’ take her shopping for Artic-grade clothes since it’s cold 10 months out of the year in Boston. And that she shouldn’t worry too much since he’d take care of things for her. It was an offer this girl could not pass up, and is thoroughly grateful for.

Many people have made that claim to this girl, particularly over the last half year. To be fair, she doesn’t quite believe most of them; but Mr. Toesocks? She truly and deeply does and she’s insanely grateful for their friendship. He’s a gentleman, respects her, respects her space, is protective of her and has the uncanny ability to make this girl feel totally comfortable around him. And, he thinks she’s one of the smartest persons he’s met-which, alone, makes him a keeper of a friend. (this girl will take compliments any-oh way they come.) She can’t wait for him to come by for a visit later this year so all her other friends can meet him. She’s decided to set up her best girlfriends with him since he’s one heck of a catch.

As the food plied on- this girl had a gorgeously tasty ham roll thing with cheese and he had a steak- he asked for a men update which reduced her to giggles since they took this time to recount her fan club page. They are going to post photos of them so he can say she came to visit the founder and president of the club. She finally got the chance to ask him what he was thinking doing up that page and he said, simply, he thought it’d make her laugh.

And sometimes, life can be that simple. Good friends. Good food. Funny stories. And if you throw in a foreign landscape, it makes it all the better.

(This post was written in Uganda. This girl is backdating it.) 

Conflicts in schedules, last minute changes and work commitments have shaved almost 10 days off this girl’s intended trip. She’s now due back Thursday; the Father is arranging the ticketing, thrilled that this girl will be home earlier than planned. He’s not so big on this girl visiting these “dangerous” places. Even if the fact is that Uganda is extremely safe.

This change in plans made this girl have to readjust her travel plans as well. She canned Rawanda; Mr. Toesocks said that not only is the journey long and rather tedious, the memorial of skulls is something this girl should pass on. It scars your soul, he says. Rafting the Nile also had to be canned because, one, she didn’t have enough time, and two, it really wasn’t that great since the weather left much to be desired. Same for the safari: one, that this girl has seen most of the animals in the safari (and its nothing compared to the South African one) and, two, the gorilla one was far too expensive for a non-guaranteed sighting.

So, today, they all made the day trip to Jinja, playing chaperon to two young love birds- kids of some of Mr. Toesocks’ friends. Oh, the wonders of young love!

Jinja, two hours out of Kampala is the tourist central of Uganda. Sort of, anyway. They set off early (seven in the morning) and drove to an eco-rainforest site to hike through a rainforest. It was pouring, the ground was muddy and it was musky. It wasn’t the most pleasant of time, and this girl would have slipped a few times if it weren’t for Mr. Toesocks grabbing her by the metaphorical scruff of her neck. Yet, it was oddly peaceful, in a very primal sort of way. They didn’t talk much, kept conversations to a minimum and whispered quiet observations to each other almost with a mystical quality reserved for pilgrims.

They took this girl on a boat ride down the River Nile, taking her to the source of the Nile: where the great Lake Victoria meets the mighty River Nile. It was an oddly calm sight, the morning storm having passed through. Standing by the side of the river- this girl didn’t dare to get too close for some reason- this girl was suddenly struck with thre realization that this was the same said river that was written about in the Bible. The same said river that baby Moses once floated down (the Egypt portion, anyway). The same river that has seen thousands of battles, fed millions of lives and witness many great world events. This is the mighty River Nile. It was a humbling moment, truly.

And that is the thing about Uganda. This girl has spent more time in other parts of the world, her home country included. Yet, she’s never felt she’s grown more as a person than the week she has spent here. There is a primeval quality to Uganda that she assumes is reflected all across rural Africa. Here, the same rules don’t apply. Here, the assumptions we make about people, their lives- humanity- don’t apply.

Here, there will always be impalas; the ones who graze the lands. And, in that same breath, you know, there will always be the cheetahs that will stalk the impalas. And just as you know the hyenas will come to steal the impalas from the cheetahs; the lions are the one that rule the roost.

That is the rule of the jungle, and that is the way of the land.

(This post was written in Uganda. This girl is backdating it.)

There is a story of a famous Japanese magician who won the right to sought out a great magician master to apprentice from him. Thing was, this magician master made this apprentices do some hard- and seemingly mundane- laborious tasks. For the whole of the first year, the apprentice would wash dishes for his master. Day in and day out, he would wash dishes. There were to be no formal classes from master to apprentice, but loads of dish washing.

The first year ran into the second year and there was still to be no formal magic training; instead, the apprentice spent his days going marketing for the magician master. Day in and day out, he would be sent of these repetitive- and seemingly mundane- mind numbing tasks.

The second year bled into the third year and, still, there was to be no formal magic training. This year, the apprentice was made to cook meals for the magician master’s entire family. Day in and day out, he would slave over the stove thinking up dishes and planning the menu for the family; a tough- and seemingly mundane- useless task.

This said magician master had many students that came to sought his apprenticeship. All failed to eek out the three years, most finding the repetitive and boring tasks on top of the no magic training a terrible waste of time. Except for this said Japanese apprentice.

Finally, after three years, the magician master called his apprentice and sat the man down and revealed the purposes of the three years of hard labour. The first year spent washing dishes was to instill in the apprentice the deep appreciation for taking care of tools. A magician has many tools and it is imperative that each instrument, however important or replaceable be treated with respect. For when you treat your things with respect, they respect you in return.

The second year, the master revealed was to train the apprentice in the art of negotiation and mediation; a core skill when one visits the market on a daily basis. Magic, the master said, require the performer to engage and manage his audience- however difficult they might be.

The final year spent cooking, the master told the apprentice, was training in being able to cater to the needs of each person in the audience. Everyone has their own tastes and food preferences, a good chef, a patient chef would best cater to suit the needs to each diner- all while not compromising quality and attitude. And this was the lesson the master wanted this apprentice to learn. Finally, the master declared, the apprentice was ready to learn his magic.

This true story was told to this girl by Mr. Toesocks who had the chance to meet this said same apprentice- today a Japanese magician master- the only one this grand master ever taught. Because, he had the dedication, teachability and attitude needed to truly master the discipline necessary to perfectly execute his craft. No cutting corners, no short cuts; but sometimes the deep understanding that hard work needs to come before greatness.